27-07-2010` Family affairs

I will prepare myself to go for next interview.

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There are issues my family and I don't see eye to eye.

They're desperated to drill their point and I am exasperated to explain to them. To a state I gave up, and believe all efforts are frutile. Like all parents, they don't expect a 'no' and demand absolute obdience.

I am unable to revert who I was 10 years ago, taking 'yes' to everything. I used to be a really good girl. See how these years of suppression has taken me.

I hate the idea they oppose my choice, for whoever it may be. Because what they see is bounded to the superficial level and not whether I am happy. I can't helped but relate it, in a crude way, assessing the ability to support my family.

I deserve better? Maybe. But how many out there is able to tolerate a fiery temper like mine?

Disappointed.

TVB 通天干探- John Lung x 晶晶!

凤凰四重奏！

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Inception is not just the best movie of 2010. It's the best movie I've watched. Smart plot outwit the processing capabilities of your brain.

What if the world I'm leading is not reality? I wished, I've been dreaming and the reality froze in November 2009 when I was still happy and full of smiles.

Maybe a headshot or a thud from a push would jolt me up.

I'm waiting.

Can you tell that something is bothering me even if I didn't say, didn't mention or didn't show a trace?

How well do you read me?

How much do I reveal?

Answers, not always pleasing to the ears.

Happily ever after, I can't see myself leading.

It takes 2 years to love; I would be lucky to escape with a 2 years sentence to unlearn. 365x3-38.

21-07-2010' Facial

Facial hurts like hell. The pokes, squeezings and swellings. I appreciate my dermatologist and her team for laser and microdermabrasion more.

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Boring day. Been lazing around like Tarepanda. I haven't been exercising. Excuses, excuses, excuses.

20-07-2010`

Writer's block.

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My gaze will still linger at the washing bay, hoping to catch a glimpse of the FIT which was once so familiar.

I would not forget how Calvin said, 'Move on'. I know a part of me is dying to keep the memories alive, refused to deny that I've been loved like nobody else.

I'm sorry.

A casual conversation and an impromptu decision chanced my virgin drive. My first drive of a van was a hilarious one. It doesn't takes much efforts for one to wonder how I managed to secure my manual driving license.

Attempted a self created circuit route in some remote area of Serangoon Garden. The verdict: Please do not allow Cheng HL to drive without supervision of a licensed (and preferrably, experienced) driver.

Thank you Wilson. :)

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In the vast cyberworld, people googled and read your blog. Apparently, with no understanding or personal interaction with the authors. Having said, on my dashboard, its stated I have 6 followers tailing my blog. hmm

09-07-2010` Bad temperment

Me and my bad temperment.

It had been taxing for us both. I wouldn't take anything less.

Don't give too much because I don't want to you to expect that much from me.

You'd be amazed how people who don't understand you, sees the fault clearer. I'm getting tired because I'm trying too hard.

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Have been keeping up with my jogs for 5 out of 6 nights. Finally, momentum is back.

How Starbucks Saved My Life - Micheal Gates Gill

Inspirational, truly. To experience happiness only at 64 years, as a Starbucks staff. From a 6 digits salary to a paycheck which barely able to meet the ends; from being served to serving; from a status of priviledged to tumble and work for an African-American. And yet, he's happier.

Happiness.

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Soaring the skies. The next audition will beon 7th Aug. Read the online forum regarding the interviews, its not gonna be easy to remain composure and sail through when the room is filled with tonnes of hot babes more qualified for the job.

Not this round I supposed.

All I know is, there is no way I can maintain to travel twice a year without blowing my savings.

Having that said, as expected, I blew my savings.

04-07-2010`

There goes, I started to cry on my journeys on buses and trains again.

Perhaps what LW said made me reflect upon myself. How horrid a gf I have been and/or still am. Pitcherplant. I can feel how tired Fab has been.

04-07-2010` Working in the air, yes, no?

Was drained from work. That spilt second, the idea of switching line rooted.

Air Stewardess

I don't have to slog so hard for a chance to go overseas.

I don't have to keep cleaning mouths for the rest of my life.

I don't have to stick to my NETT paycheck. No, -$300 from last month's which is unaccountable for. @#$%#^%*(*^@

I don't have to work my brain and hands out, tearing my tendons and breaking my joints.