C E F L

C says: you are very blessed. To be able to choose. When you look back, you can tell your children and grandchildren about this.

F says: even if you don’t want F, you still have C. There are many people queuing for you.

I say: I am undeserving, and indebted to C, maybe somehow to F. I love E, but I’m confused. On one side, he still pinned my messages as the first in WhatsApp, but on the flip side, he wants to maintain our distance, he will not hold my hand.

E says: I love you. But the way I love you is not how you’d hope for.

I am broken. I seem to live my life by days. I get the occasional high when he texts or calls.